Category Archives: Love

joyeux anniversaire 7, mon bebe

before we looked like parents

before we looked like parents

Haha..eh, not that we look bad like parents now okay. We just look fatherly and motherly (okok, which means more weight put on lar.)

The addition of Sarah into our family 5 days earlier, coupled with a few crazy dreams, and some errant hormones, has gotten me into a pensive mood for our anniversary this year. I had been wanting to write an entry about our anniversary. But wasn’t too sure how to go about it without being repetitive.

A WhatsApp chat with a friend over the weekend got me thinking about how hooking up with Donald had been a huge gamble and how it paid off.

Did you love Donald when you  dated him?”  No, I replied. But I liked him enough to think really hard about hooking up with him. We had somewhat differing views about religion, I was going back to SG whilst he remained in AUS, and we had not gotten to know each other for a really long time.

We dated for more than 6 months before I told him that  ‘I more than like you’  haha. Not so serious like love, but more serious than like.

Sarah’s arrival 4 weeks earlier than expected, has truly showed me what he is capable of as a husband to me and as a father to my children. On the morning of labour, he had just casually said, ‘I need to step up even more, for the boys and you.’ And then he started nagging me to pack my hospital bag. Hahahaha. WTH.

The evening before, I was feeling horribly sick. I couldn’t finish cooking dinner and went to lie down. It got worse when nothing would come up, and I felt bad enough to feel that I couldn’t even breathe properly. Fortunately, his major meeting had ended in the morning and I told him that he needed to be home. He finished his work as quickly as possible and came home immediately. It was the type of emotional support and assurance that he gave when I got sick. I do actually feel bad when I have to tell him to come home to take over when I get sick. It meant extra responsibilities on him, on top of work. So..gotta try not to fall sick that often lor.

So back to delivery day. He had the morning off, I had to go for a meeting. Obviously the meeting never happened cos shortly after I got off the floor from searching for my pump parts and sorting out the milk bottles….my waterbag leaked. Uh oh. And he went into kancheong mode, cos..hospital bag not packed! And I had orders for the weekend.

Great. Priorities. Complete orders (me), he will pack the bag for Sarah and will try what to pack what he can for me. He then decides the schedule for the rest of the day cos he needs to sort the boys out, collect stuff, hand the boys over to the in-laws, then come and meet me, if I was to be admitted. haha It was a HUGE if. We were joking that it was just a false alarm. I mean, waterbag leaking only leh. Time check, 9am.

By the time I left the house, it was about 10.40am. Grabbed a cab and went on my way.  We kept each other updated. One hour later, it was confirmed that I was to be admitted and to deliver Sarah the same day. Some of the mummies I got to know in a group chat thought it was crazy that I was doing all this alone at the moment. Donald joined me later at 6pm, 4 hours before the arrival of Sarah.

post delivery selfie

post delivery selfie

Was it crazy for me to be by myself most of the time? No. I would rather him be able to complete what he was doing, sort out the kids properly before coming to me with a peace of mind. And like each pregnancy, I marvel at how he knows what I want to know at each stage of the labour process. He keeps me updated with enough information to persevere through the next stage of labouring. He quickly takes a photo of baby so that I can see how she looks like whilst they clean her up (yes I am THAT kancheong!). He tells me how bad my stitches are gonna be. Hahaha. And how he rushes off after making sure I am fine after delivery, to grab my favourite curry rice from Jalan Besar.

To this man whom I’ve been together for 11 years,

– I ended up having Macs post delivery cos the curry rice shop was closed for Mid-Autumn;
– You went home to sleep on the huuuuge comfy bed that you have missed sleeping on for the past year or so, to co-sleep with the boys on a single bed so that I could rest well;
– You went back to regular parenting duties despite having slept for 5 hours and then stayed home with the boys the following night;
– You then made sure everything was prepped and ready for both Sarah and I for when we came home, including adjusting the water pressure on the bidet in the toilet just in case it would be too strong for my stitches;
– You did copious amounts of laundry just to make sure we had extras;
– You were at my beck and call for everything, you made sure you could attend to me as much as quickly as possible, cos my water retention has hit epic trotters level;
– You told me you felt bad that I was doing the cooking and you weren’t able to cook me my favourite foods but you understood why I had to do it;
– You understood my need to have this week together as a family, just the five of us; AND
 – You told your son that the best thing that ever happened to you was to marry me, and then having the kids as your children.

This huge gamble I took? It paid off big time and I am still reaping in the payoffs.

And I hope you know how much it means to have you in my life. Happy wedding anniversary, and yes, I’m very sure Sarah is the last kid. You can officially relax now.

Hahahahahah

 

Category: Love, Special

[SC June’16] to the kids: Your Daddy.

Posted on by 8 comments

Dear Oliver, Quentin & Sarah,

It’ll be Father’s Day soon. Instead of me writing a post for your daddy, let me write to you about your daddy. I mean, it is Father’s Day..not Husband’s Day right?

But first, let me tell you a little about my daddy, your kong kong. My daddy nags. ALOT. And says the most inane thing ever.

Like how cold water will make your lungs cold and make your cough worse. And then he offers you potato chips 10 mins later.

Like how that wouldn’t aggravate your cough further eh?

But I know my daddy loves me in his own way. He would not hesitate to pick me up after my outing at 11pm if I should ask him to. He has spent a good few months picking me up from work when it ended at 11.30pm during my high school days.

He always made sure I had enough money.

He does the best back rub too! Haha. And he definitely didn’t hesitate when I said I wanted to go back to Tasmania to do a post grad when I really wanted to go back to spend more time with YOUR daddy.

your daddy's super fail attempt at courting me.

your daddy’s super fail attempt at courting me.

He grumbled for sure. But he signed the dotted line on the telegraphic transfer for the 1st semester of school fees.

That is my daddy.

Now your daddy. He loves me too, almost as much as my daddy. Haha. But it is good enough. And it makes me glad he is your daddy.

Your daddy works hard to provide for us. He wants only the best for you three and more if he could. But because he needs to work, he depends on me to tell him about your growth, milestones and development. Each time I update him about you guys, either via phone or after you have gone to bed, he listens intently. He loved being involved in your lives as much as possible.

twas the midnight after Ollie was born

twas the midnight after Ollie was born

Oliver, when you were born, your daddy couldn’t stop staring at you for the first night. He couldn’t believe that you were his and his to protect and love. You are his first and his favourite and he is fiercely proud of you. Every thing you did and how you progress amazes your daddy.

Clockwise, TL: 1yo, 2yo, 2yo, 3yo

Clockwise, TL: 1yo, 2yo, 2yo, 3yo

QT a few days old

QT a few days old

Quentin, you came 6 weeks too early and you were so vulnerable. Where I couldn’t bond with you, your daddy stepped in. He ferried precious milk to you every day and made sure he spent time with you. He ‘forced’ me to spend some time with you so I could bond and nurse you. He made sure I was emotionally supported so that I could care for you.

Clockwise, TL: 1yo, 1.5yo, 1.5yo, 2yo

Clockwise, TL: 1yo, 1.5yo, 1.5yo, 2yo

Sarah, you are the special one. Your daddy knew that I wanted another child badly and even tho some of the odds are against us, he gave in. It wasn’t easy. He wanted another child too, but he also wanted to make sure he was still able to look after your brothers and I as well. No one would get any less because of your arrival.

But my baby girl to be, you are going to be his princess and he is going to protect you and your heart. Trust me on that. Your daddy has protected my heart, and has been my pillar of strength and support since we got together. You will not get any less than what I have experienced. Maybe even more.

boys collage

Boys, I hope I will raise you to be like your father. Be a gentleman, be respectful of ladies and treat her right. And by treating her right, it doesn’t mean giving in to her whim & fancies. But treating her with due respect that she gives you too.

I hope that I will raise you to love your kids the way your daddy loves you. The way he takes his time to understand you and to talk to you. The way he wants to know everything about you.

I hope I will raise you to love your wives and work together in partnership as your daddy does with me. That we are not just husband and wife but we are soulmates, that we complete each other despite our differences. That you will protect her with all your heart cos she has given her heart to you.

Sarah, I hope you will find a man who loves you almost as much as your daddy loves you. That you will find a man who is like your daddy. That you will find a man who is after your heart and mind.

I hope I will raise you to treat your man right, to give him the credit & love due.

That you will guard his heart as he will guard yours from hurt.

I hope that I will raise you to be independent and that you will learn that your man is not there to serve you but for you to work together with in the different phases of your life.

And I hope you will be able to see him as the father of your child. Sharing every burden and joy as you watch your kids grow.

For these are the very characteristics of your daddy. Some I knew of when I chose to marry him. Some I only knew of after we had you three. Your daddy ages like wine, and it gets better when you hang around with him longer. Of course there are the bitter bits, but those are minor enough to ignore.

Where I cannot be your role model, I hope you will let your daddy be one. ?

Now go say Happy Father’s Day to your daddy.

Xoxo
Mummy

This month, Singapore’s Child features celebrity daddies like Andie Chen, your every day daddy like Lee Kin Mun, aka Mr Brown, and Minister Tan Chuan Jin. Read on and find out how fatherhood has changed their lives and how they cope with it!

Disclaimer: tings.sg is the Digital Partner for Singapore’s Child and I received a complimentary issue of the magazine for review purposes. All opinions are solely mine and are written as objectively as possible. 

Category: Ad, Kids, Love, Special

one for the digital album: the Proposal Story

Posted on by 0 comment

This week, I’m participating in a Proposal Blog Train where a group of mummy & daddy bloggers will be writing about how they got proposed to, or how they proposed to their spouses.

Soooo today is my turn. Haha. Yesterday, Ashlyn posted about hers, so go read about it too!

The Chill Mom

Given the crazy schedule I got this week, I was hoping that I could find a version that I had written before, but nooooo. I also couldn’t possibly post up the feature we got on the digital version of the papers (homahgawd, that was a bonus man!! Wedding of the week leh hahaha). So, for posterity’s sake, here is our (or rather, my) version.

It was 2008 and we were living in Perth, had been dating & living together for 3 years. 3 years of 24/7. In Singapore terms..that is like double the dating period? haha. Especially since we wouldn’t get to live with each other in SG. Spending our lives together for the rest of our lives was on the cards (we were sorta past the boyfriend/girlfriend stage then) but then again, we weren’t sure where we were heading then (if we would still be in Aus or back in SG) and if that paper document stating our status as a married couple was definitely necessary.

But..hey, lao niang want to get married hor. Hahaha got chance to wear wedding gown leh! Why not right. The topic came up one night. For the life of me, I cannot remember how it even came up. I just know that it was in winter, we were huddling in the study watching some drama serial (maybe Little Nonya?) and somewhere in the conversation, we dared each other to tell our parents we wanted to get married.

WTH. Went along the lines of ‘well, if you are serious, then Imma call my mother and tell her about it!’ and he replied with a ‘call lah!’

So that night we called our parents and told them the news. Wayhey, we are getting married! Just.like.that. Seriously. Was I expecting a proposal or did I wish for one? Secretly of course I wished for one lah, but err, after getting it wrong one time (people so secretly come meet me at my grandma’s house and then take out one box, what the heck was I supposed to think???), I didn’t think much about it at that moment. After a few months tho..I started bugging him for one. Even though wedding plans were already in place.

photo taken by Derrick Ong Photography

photo taken by Derrick Ong Photography

The Tings then. Doing things all wrong. Hahaha.

To give you the low down, Donald is quite good with surprises. Like you would NEVER suspect anything kind good. But after being together for 11 years, and getting enough surprises for the first few years (sad life, now become wife liao got no surprises), innocent questions are enough for me to suss things out.

During one of the trips back to SG for our wedding preps, we went ring shopping and I had more or less decided on the engagement ring I wanted. But I wanted to think a little more about it. Little did I know that Donald had asked the jeweller to put it aside and that we would go back again and test to see if it was THE ring. The jeweller was to then tell me that it had be sold. And boy, was I disappointed when I found out that it had been ‘sold’ the following day. Never mind. The sneaky guy, on the pretext of needing to go to the loo, rushed back to the jeweller’s 15 mins after we left to seal the deal, pick up the ring and then head back with me. I almost blew his cover when I asked him if he was sure he didn’t buy the ring and told the jeweller’s to tell me that it was sold, and that the ring was in his bag (which it really was!).

Ladies and gentlemen. Reverse psychology does work. His reply? ‘Don’t believe, check lah!’ hahaha. So fortunately for him, I didn’t check his bag. But I sure as hell was whinging a little about missing out on the ring.

Fast forward to next day, to the proposal-that-was-supposed-to-happened, where I was to meet him at City Hall MRT station. I coincidentally found out that he was nearby at Bugis MRT station and decided that I would meet him there instead of City Hall MRT. I was whinging more about the ring and teasing him about when he was going to be proposing to me.

D: Where would you like to be proposed at?

Me: hmm..here lah! (at Bugis MRT) afterall, it’s the closest to where we got our wedding rings!

Again, ladies and gentlemen. It looks really romantic when the guy proposes in the public. Girl gasps as guy takes ring box out and then tears when he proposes and then nods her head in agreement. IT IS NOT FOR ME OKAY. homahgawd. 

Donald takes the box out and gets on one knee and proposes. I’m mortified. 

Me: okok, get up!! Yes yes! *looks furtively around*

My audience? One lao ah pek sitting and wondering what the hell we are doing, and another teenager engrossed in phone. Phwah piangs. This was NOT what I was expecting. hahahahah.

The proposal-that-was-supposed-to-happened. Donald was supposed to get ahead of me and stick A4 sheets of paper with the words ‘Will You Marry Me?” on the partition separating the escalators of the MRT leading to Raffles City Shopping Centre. However, he was late. And he was late because he wanted to make sure he wouldn’t get into trouble sticking stuff at the MRT station. Hahahahha. Okay, so maybe heng he didn’t get to do it because I would be lagi paiseh then. But hey, at least he got put in some thought lah. (Darn, was gonna post photos of those papers but I cannot find them!! =( Argh..gotta go dig around and find it to post.)

And I got the ring I wanted!! <33

Up next is http://www.babiesintheart.com. Evangeline is a FTWM of a boy named Arthur (3) and a girl named Arthena (Going 1). She is a young looking mom who always got mistaken as the sister of her children. Don’t be cheated by her looks. She love to surprise others and she surprised many by being a mother of 2 by the age of 28. Read on to find out how her husband proposed to her with his romantic tactics.

IMG_8429

 

Category: Love, Special