the dark side of parenthood

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There are checklists for pregnancy diets, for your hospital bag, for the items you need to prepare for the arrival of your little one and even one for vaccinations.

There isn’t one for your death. Morbid much?

We had insurances. D had made sure he was covered sufficiently so that I could continue to be a SAHM in the event he dies before I do. Spouse taken care of? Check.

D had also attended a workshop on will writing a few years back and ever since he told me about it, and when our first kiddo was born, it was on my mind. So I was taken care of, but what about the kids in the event both of us die at the same time?

For my birthday last year, I told D that I wished for us to have our wills done. It is a reality and it was something I needed done now should anything happen to the both of us. And I wanted to make sure I was prepared. So off we went to the lawyers and we did up a simple will.

We have:
1) a trustee to manage the funds in the event the boys are below 21;
2) a guardian to look after the boys and their well-being; and
3) an executor of your will.

When choosing the above, we had to make sure that they were people both of us knew we could trust. Trust them to do a good job of what they are tasked with and have good common sense to make decisions on behalf of the kids. Basically..as good as being the next set of parents for them. The people you select need to know what they are in for. It is a huge responsibility and not to be simply assigned to just anyone.

Then there are CPF nominations (next) and Lasting Power of Attorney (much later in life).

It wasn’t easy to think about it when we went through what and how we wanted the will to be like. There were tears, at the thought of leaving the kids behind. But at least I feel at ease knowing the kids are taken care of.

A simple will will cost from $350 onwards and our lawyer used a template their firm uses. We were then able to add in a clause (extra) in the event the kids are minors when we pass. You will need full details n photocopies of IC for trustees, guardian and executor.

Category: Daily

9 comments on “the dark side of parenthood

  1. Cmmmmmm This is practical but something young parents hardly put on their to-do list because hey, we expect to live beyond 60. Then again, this should be done no matter what!

  2. hubby made sure we have sufficient insurance to take care of any of us if anything happens but I’ve been wanting to make wills too. My FIL passed away suddenly without one and it was a very messy, tedious affair since nobody knew fully what kind of investments, insurances, property etc. he had! This is really something nobody should take for granted.

    Ai @ Sakura Haruka

  3. I agree! as much as no one wants to leave suddenly, the best we can do is to ensure our kids have their lives in order if one of us suddenly goes. Thanks for sharing!

  4. Ah, I have been wanting to get my will written up but life, ironically, got in the way. I should really get started!

  5. Funny how I did insurance and financial studies back in school but never quite find the need to have myself properly insured until I became a mum. now I ensure everyone is covered one way or another, especially hospitalisation. Will is not something I’ve think about yet cos our assets aren’t many and insurance all already has got their respective nominees and trustees.

  6. We haven’t written our wills yet but this is reminding me that we should think about doing so.

  7. I haven’t thought of writing my will yet, thinking that the insurance that we bought should be able to take care of our children if *touchwood* anything happens.

  8. My hubby and I have been talking about getting our wills done for the longest time but we have not got down to doing it. It’s tough deciding the right guardian and trustee for our kids…

  9. My parents and my elder sister all got their wills done. But somehow I am not quite sure what’s the purpose of doing so. I mean, my parents and sis have many assets and are definitely more well-off than I am. I’m not too sure what I have to include in my will in the first place?? But come to think of it.. If I don’t have a will, doesn’t my HDB flat and bank account balance automatically go to my kids?