what makes my man

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the men in my life0

sometimes I think it is not easy being a guy. it is not easy being a husband. it is not easy being a husband AND a father.

What sparked off this post was a comment that the husband said, and what had gone through my mind earlier this week. Stark contrast.

The kids had been sick this week, starting with Ollie who was coughing over the weekend before it ended up being a full blown cough and cold by Monday evening. Donald also caught it and spent the day at home on Tuesday. QT caught the tail end of it which led to him having a fever yesterday, and continuing till today. Me? Hanging in there but was half-dead when I woke up this morning, having spent the night sponging QT who did not seem to respond well to paracetamol.

ahhh. the ugly side of parenthood. Don’t we all love it?

I asked Donald if he could stay home to help me out, and he agreed. He spent the morning with the kids whilst I quickly finished up some immediate work owing, before taking over with QT, whilst he dropped Ollie off at school. I ended up holding QT to sleep on the sofa. Donald did the laundry and then asked..

‘Is there anything else you want me to do? Have I done enough?’

To be honest, I wondered if he was asking me sarcastically. You know, like your majesty, have I done enough kinda way. And then I decided that he was really genuinely asking me. And then I wondered if I should ask him to mop the floor cos it was getting on my nerves, but I also did think..aiyar we can survive another day of the mess. We’ll clean up when we are all feeling better. 

‘Well..I would like you to mop the floor but don’t worry about it. I can do it another time.’

Before I knew it, he had taken the mop and done a quick wipe around the living room. It was good enough. It was then I compared the thoughts I had earlier this week, with what I was feeling now. This is what I wrote on Tuesday:

Sometimes…i think I put a lot of pressure on myself.

Make sure kids dun get ipad so often (or rather no ipad), less tv, do more activities. And i feel like i damn bo eng to do my stuff cos i gotta entertain my kids

Then the hubby takes over this morning. I still take one kid to do marketing, come back…everyone on devices. Didi gets hubby’s phone, ollie gets ipad, hubby gets to be on his laptop looking at his shares.

And i tmd think why the fuck i work so hard for.

Is like he on mc and he still get to do his things. And i no chance to take mc, stay at home but i gotta wait till one go to school, one nap liao then i can focus on things. Then tell ppl i damn busy whole day, ppl sometimes give me face.

Faaark. What logic.

Yup. That was what I thought about the hubby that day. I was tired and I did think the worst of him. And then today, I was thinking, WAHMy hero. 

The days when I think the worst of him are when I am feeling unappreciative and down, more so when I am tired. Then I start nitpicking about all the other things that I thought he could have helped with to make me feel less tired.

Why couldn’t he help with the laundry?
Why is it so difficult for him to mop the floor the way I wanted it to be mopped?
Why is he not pro-active in helping out?

I think the worst part was thinking he doesn’t take the initiative. Most of the time it stems from that. We do have our chats about what we think he should be doing more off, what he could do to offload my chores when he is back. Sometimes it takes an argument to find out what we expect and want from each other. Sometimes we forget that we are first husband & wife, before we can be parents.

So the good bits about him? He really takes orders from me. I don’t do it in a commanding way okay! But more like he doesn’t ask questions, he just pretty much does it. If me, I sure ask why. Why you want me to do it? *suspicious mode on*. Sometimes he does surprises me when he does the household chores without any prompting.

His reason? Cannot always do, else you won’t get surprised & think waah so nice of my husband!. WTH. What logic. hahaha. #assholehusband

He really does try with the kids. Sometimes the kids are just clingy and want to stick with me. No fault of his really, but I mean, when you are faced with kids who don’t want you, how good can you feel? (I asked the hubby this, and he was like I don’t feel bad! All the better man! -_-“)

But about what happened on Tuesday. It has occurred on a few occasions. And I have always felt annoyed at that. Drives me nuts in fact. But heck, cos I am heading out so I shouldn’t really care less. Lao niang get to do things in peace and am out. So gotta learn how to close two eyes, cos afterall it’s Daddy Ting looking after. But..if the two give me nonsense after the iPad iPhone session..then Daddy Ting is gonna have to handle that. haha.

But I will give credit where it is due lar. =P You’re DA BEST. Thanks for being my calm in the storm. And you better step up your game cos things are gonna get crazier now that the boys are crazier too!

 

 

Category: Daily, Love

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