Tag Archives: parenthood

WAIT

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“Wait Ollie, mummy’s just going to finish hanging out the laundry and we’ll play together okay?”

“Oh Quentin, wait ah, mummy’s almost done and then I’ll feed you.”

Maybe I’m being a little self-conscious about it now, I realized that I have been using the word “wait” a lot lately on both the monsters. With Ollie, it is easier to manage because there is the television but even monsters get sick of the television and want some human interaction. Well..it is that way with Ollie.

I’m still in the process of transitioning from one kid to two kids. QT has been fairly easy going, still sleeping a fair bit, but keeping awake long enough to keep me away from my chores. There’s a bit of sibling tag team which drives me insane. You know, the kind of moment where you deal with one and just when you think you can get back to what you were doing in the first place, you have to deal with the other. Which kinda makes doing a lot of things a little difficult.

Like baking cookies. Right, like if I don’t bake cookies it would be the end of the world. But Ollie likes cookies and I want him to have awesome memories of having home-baked cookies, and look at me with those cute eyes and ask for “2 bikits? 2 only.”

See, when I became a SAHM, I envisioned being in the most ideal situation dealing with a kid and running the household. By the end of Ollie’s first year, the house looked nowhere like those in the magazines by the end of the day. I was a stickler for how orderly the house should look. It made me feel good when the house looked good. I still do think that way, except that my expectations are soooo lowered that the house will only look good when I feel up to it enough. Haha. That was a swift kick enough to my arse.

With two kids? Hah. Donald should be happy there is even a nice meal on the table. Okay, nice meal according to my standards, not Donald’s. Donald’s idea of dinner is a simple meal, whatever takes the shortest time to prepare. My idea of dinner is a nice meal, which means something like a roast chicken, or cauliflower gratin, a meal which probably makes the kitchen look like a tornado has gone through it by the time I am done cooking, only cause I got interrupted by the kids. Oh let’s not get to the mess outside in the living room.

I was picking up Ollie’s board books in the living room, about to commence the night ritual of cleaning up when QT started fussing. And I said “wait QT, mummy’s almost done”. And I remembered that I seemed to have said it a lot of times today.

And I remembered the moments where Ollie didn’t have to wait, and he said and did lots and made me laugh a lot.

He watered the our plants by himself today.
“Ollie loves cookies! Cookie monster, ohm nom nom”
He sat next to me and ate his pasta all by himself, finishing every bit of it.
“Ollie wants crackers. Bikits? 2 bikits? 1 gummy. 1 only.”
Puts socks on his hands and tried to put on his shoes.
Stood on a carton and gave me a running commentary of what he could see outside the window.
Hopped around the house, “Ollie is a kangaroo! Hop hop!”
Sees his bathrobe when I placed the dried laundry on an armchair and exclaims “Daddy bring Ollie schweeming! Daddy dry Ollie with the towel.”
Helps sort some of the laundry out by identifying the owners of the top.
“Ollie wants to lie next to 弟弟” when QT was placed on the play gym.
“Mummy tired. Mummy sleep next to Ollie” when I handed him my phone to watch some videos (haha, yes I do that occasionally so I can get a 10-15 minute catnap in the mornings).
Runs off to get his diaper when I bribed him with chocolate to change his diaper. This includes putting everything back in place before running back to me with fresh diaper.
He is very particular about the order of things. Mess up a nursery rhyme or a song and he will correct you. Donald and I love teasing him and changing the lyrics, which usually sends him into a tizzy.

I guess I really need to cut back on telling the kids to wait. We get so much more out of them then. How else will I get my daily dose of toddler comedy? Haha =P

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blink-miss

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Oh hai.

At 2 months, QT finally fits into the 0-3 mths pjs. I figured it might be time for him to switch from the newborn pjs to the 0-3 mths when his feet couldn’t really fit into the sleepsuit.

Has it only been 2 months? Compared to handling Ollie when he was a newborn, this sure feels like it has been ages. Must be the lack of sleep haha.

The boys are growing fast. I know, I contradict. Time is passing slow, but the boys are growing fast. Go figure. QT is filling up into his clothes. He is sooooo chubby that I can’t resist pinching his cheeks. He is still pretty old soul. He occasionally gives you that rare smile. Otherwise, to put it in a friend’s words “he is so zen!” Yep. That’s my old soul monster alright. He is pretty strong, with lifting up his neck and kicking his feet. I reckon he pretty much “stands” when I lift him up against me when I am seated. He’s got a mean kick too. *grumble*

And then there is Ollie. He has gotten to speaking with specifics. A couple of days ago, Ollie stepped on Marcus’ tail (again) and this time I am guessing it annoyed Marcus enough for him to give Ollie a swipe, resulting in a couple of scratches. So when told to recount what happened to Donald, he said “Marcus bite you (me) on the left leg.” I am impressed. I do not know where that came about, but I am impressed. *pride*

I guess Ollie is also starting to be aware about the attention being shared between QT and him. I feel guilty about not spending too much time with QT. I mean all he does at this time is really eat and sleep. There are the occasional hour or two that he is awake, and I sometimes place him on the play gym for some tummy time or to watch the mobile. The rest of the time is spent with Ollie. And Ollie, in that attempt to be noticed, would build/construct something out of his blocks and then come and get me if I am in the kitchen or away from him.

“Mummy come see! Hold hands. Mummy hold hands and see.” He would no longer settle for a “oh really? That’s awesome”. I had to physically follow him, holding his hand and sit with him (“mummy sit here.”) and examine said construct. It is endearing. And I am humbled by it. I read an article recently about praising/overpraising a child. One of the points was empty praise. You know, saying for the sake of saying it. I am definitely guilty of it, especially when I am indulging in some mobile phone time. Just to get him off my back. I have been trying to change that, and take more notice of him and what he is doing. And we have been having some better times.

There are still that occasional 2-3 smacks he gives QT. It really shits me but I am trying so hard to not give Ollie a hard time about it. I am torn between not wanting him to feel isolated or threatened by QT versus yelling at him to get him to stop the behaviour (and potentially worsening the situation). Poor QT would wail for a bit post smack and after being picked up by me. I know he probably wouldn’t remember the incident but I feel so bad for him, that I am not being able to protect him much from his older brother.

Argh. Damn you, guilt.

May be it is because a couple of friends have mentioned that my boys are growing up really fast, that I have taken a second look at how they have been progressing. I mean..it is already mid-April. Almost 1/3 of the year has passed.

Damn you, time.

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初五

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on meds

Lying here alone in the delivery ward sure gives you so much time to ponder. So many thoughts running through my mind at that point in time.

See..Quentin is 34 weeks and I am in labour. Brilliant. Started off with some bleeding..and then more bleeding. I had some contractions earlier but just figured they were Braxton Hicks. Come to think of it, I had some bad contractions on Sat but it felt like my usual constipation poop kinda feeling. TMI I know.

Who would have thought everything would begin after a shower before bed? It was as though Quentin decided that “hey mom, screw sleep! I wanna see the world man!” Bah. Hello, I am the one sleep deprived whilst this fella inside would sleep on and off. I was admitted into the delivery ward and put on a cocktail of beds to try and slow/try to stop the contractions, received two jabs of steroids so that Quentin’s lungs could mature and then antibiotics as well. Fun times.

It didn’t help that I was not allowed off the bed. Friends will know that unless I am so super sick, I will be out and about. But no, here am I, feeling somewhat hunky dory but not allowed off the bed. I swear I was gonna get piles and everything you could catch with total bedrest. I sure as hell could not imagine what life was gonna be like if I had to wait in bed until Quentin was 37 weeks to be delivered. But thankfully, thankfully, Quentin was of a good weight and good position to be delivered. So phew!

But there were so many thoughts. I was thinking about Ollie cos I was gg to be away from him for god knows how many days. I was thinking about Quentin and how I needed to hang in there for 36 hrs just so the steroids can help mature his lungs. I was thinking about how prepared we were to take care of a premie. I was thinking about medical costs after we learnt that we were going on a per item charge cos I was in pre-term labour and Quentin’s neonatal care could possibly hit in excess of $20k if he had to stay until he was 37 weeks.

But I am fortunate and I have a God who provides in my time of need and I have prayerful friends who supported me in their own ways. Through messages. Through their prayers. Through their presence made know.

I’m fortunate I have my mom and sis who came over to my place immediately to take over watching Ollie whilst I got admitted. Ollie was to stay at my parents’ place till further notice. I think Ollie was enjoying himself and doesn’t really notice our absence (not sure if I am happy or sad hahah). They keep Donald and I updated of his little antics. During my time of painful contractions, I was focusing a lot on Ollie to get through the worst of it. I hummed the “ABC” song when I had my epidural jab just to take my mind off the pain only cos it was Ollie’s favourite song. My little pillar of strength in addition to the big one frm Donald and an even bigger pillar from God.

I thought about Donald. How in such times of worry and drastic changes, he stands through for me. I find our relationship and marriage strengthening through this experience as he cares for me; wiping me down, holding my sick bag, keeping me calm with his reminders as per the doctor’s instructions. The past two days have been hectic for him. He has had to handover work stuff suddenly instead of a month later. He has had to shuttle between work, home and my parents’ place to discuss and make arrangements and then back to the hospital to be with me, to support me.

And then I look at this man I married a lot more differently. I love you and thank you.

Then all of a sudden, Quentin was born. There was more waiting inbetween but the delivery was quick and uneventful. There had to be nothing more wonderful than hearing that lusty cry of your child after he is born. I did not get a chance to hold him cos the moment he was born he was handed to the neonatal team on standby. Getting checked and warmed up. But boy, could he cry. Where Ollie cried a little and went back to sleep, this fella was quiet for a bit and then went for the kill to cry it all out. Aiyoh.

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cleaned and bundled up Quentin

I told Donald the beanie…made him look like a yubari melon with the stem on the top hahaha. But it was nice to see him rosy. And was also good to hear that I will get to see him later this morning.

Gosh. So here we are, parents of TWO little monsters. It probably won’t sink in till we bring Quentin home. Lemme enjoy my quiet rest for now and I cam’t wait to see both my monsters in the morning!

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